My Luck Could Change

War on War

Yeah, yeah yeah. It's been a while. You all should have known better than to bother checking my blog while Erwin was in town. He was only here for the weekend before going to Lawton for a week, but I think he had a good time. At the very least, he wasn't in Fallujah these past few days when warplanes have been blowing the shit out of it.

And the misleading headline thing? Deal.

Erwin got into town Friday afternoon. We got our requisite Chinese food and I ate twice as much as the bastard. Even on vacation he's trying to watch his weight. I'm miffed. I wanted a partner in a toxic frolic through all things fast food. But no. He came to our band practice and then out with Chris and Rob and I to Scolari's / the Ken Club / Chasers for drinks and a band at each bar. The funniest part of the evening was when we pulled up to the Ken and everyone gets out of the car - but Rob. Claims he stuck, the safety belt won't unlock. So, after 15 minutes of trying every stupid little thing - reverse. stop. drive. reverse. lock. unlock. - he cut himself out of my car. So I've had the car for 3 weeks and already I've had to replace a window and now I'm down a safety belt.

Saturday Matt, Erwin and I saw The Motorcycle Diaries down in Hillcrest. My father's review was much more poignant than anything I could write:

It was everything you could want in a movie. Friendship and camaraderie. A love story, too. High adventure. Beautiful scenery. Beautiful people. Slapstick comedy. Excellent music. Adversity overcome. And a political message. If you don't come out of the movie ready to join the revolution (or start one), you slept through the movie - and how could you have done that?

Which is actually kinda funny, because jet-lagged Erwin fell asleep a couple times. But I thought it was fabulous and fun and is highly recommended. Next up, What the (bleep) Do We Know?

After the movie, we went to the Alibi where, of course, I got mind blowingly wasted and made a complete ass of myself. Which is why they love me there.

On the drive home, this stuff kept coming on my windshield and no matter what I did it wouldn't stop. It took me, seriously, like 3 minutes to realize it was raining out. I'd forgotten what it was like. Since then, it's been raining almost every day. Crazy rain. Reminicent of the horrible, tragic storms we had this spring. I want my sunshine tax back. They're jacking my rent up to over $1300 now, so we're looking for a new place again come December.

Sunday Chris called me to say that Mike quit, so now we have no drummer. Hmm. So stayed in that night and watched some rented movies, hung out with Erwin til the wee.

Monday had to drop Erwin off at the airport for his week long adventure in the depressing white-trash paradise that is Lawton, OK. I guess he's having a kind of shit time so far, except for being able to go to the AM PM in pajamas and not even be noticed. Poor guy. He'll be back in San Diego for another week starting Sunday, so hopefully that'll cheer him up before he goes back to the bloody sand of Iraq. Well, unless I can finally convince him to hop in my trunk and take a road trip to Vancouver with me...

Since then, nothing much. Brain dead now from two big exams two days in a row. I, of course, was the first one done on my linguistics exam tonight, so instead of waiting around in the rain for an hour for a 45 minute lecture on grammar, I stole off and drove home listening to vibraphone-heavy jazz and skatting my own way through. Now it's me, some Soul Coughing, blogging, and detox tea. I've got that cozy, warm feeling that only being inside on a stormy night can give you. Life is good.

M.S. If you haven't seen it already, watch John Stewart be the bastion of good media...thanks randomfoo.net, whoever you are

ARREST STORY open thread

THIS HAPPENED YEARS AGO

Because we all have a dirty little secret that we enjoy telling the whole world, I present to you my ARREST STORY. Feel free to comment with your own. I'd rather enjoy that.

So, as the story goes, Adam suprises me with babysitters and whisks me away to Tijuana. Walk across the border and stop at the first barra we see for a shot. Continue on down la avenida revolucion to some hole in the wall (basement wall) bar. Have a margarita. Order another. Everything goes black. Remember, kids, this was during my proud tradition of drinking 200 pound Marines under the table. 3 drinks does not a black out make, not then, not now, not even when I was 15. Thank you, Czech liver!

So anyway, I guess I act erraticly for a while, scratch Adam up, god knows what else. So he drags me upstairs and outside to a bench for 4 hours while we watch the Tijuana traffic and zebra painted burros go by. Still in blackout mode, I make it through the border check. The lights flip on again as I literally bump into a cop (thank God an AMERICAN cop). Despite Adam's protests, I'm thrown into the drunk tank, hands twist-tied, and presumably awaiting my free ride downtown to sober up and be released.

Well, so much for that. I was getting on quite well with all the cops inside. If you've drank with me, you know I'm an irresistable charmer and even San Diego's finest are no match for my sly wit and innuendo. I got permission from the head honcho there, because of my back problems, to stand up and stretch so long as I didn't leave my area. Well, as I'm excersizing my head-honcho given right, the cop that was arguing outside with Adam walks in and tells me to "sit the fuck down." In trying to not break eye contact with him (mistake. See: grizzly bear), I'm groping behind me with my tied hands to find my chair and reply to his nasty demand with something equally nasty (along the lines of insinuating that he enjoys having sex with his mother). So he lunges for my throat, presumably to help me back into my chair.

Little did he know that I have Tae Kwon Do training. I front kicked him in the chest and knocked him off balance. It is then the pain begins. I guess cops don't like it when people fight back as my eyelids were helpfully held open while they emptied a can of mace into my brain.

So, instead of downtown, it was off to Las Colinas in Santee. I'm fingerprinted, photographed (with my eyes closed, of course. Even 4 days later, in the shower the pepper spray would reignite). There's about 10 other women in the cell with me and I'm not making eye contact with anyone (mostly cuz it was physically impossible). At this point, I'm starting to get scared that I'm going to be booked for assaulting an officer. I'm assuming that's jail time and decide I'm not going to be anybody's bitch. They hand me my breakfast and I let it slam to the floor. I look mean. Then, it gets really boring being mean and over the hours I make friends with all the girls there (except for the totally cracked out one that everyone tried to avoid.) That is the end of the interesting part. I sit in jail for the rest of the morning, one of the last to be released, wait for an hour for Adam to come and get me while thanking the lord that I just got a "Kick a cop and get out of jail free" card.

When I told my Dad what happened, he said he was proud of me. I take shit from no one, especially when buzzed on roofies.

(addendum) Completely forgot to mention that Erwin was the last one standing at my house...totally taking care of my infant son even though he had no idea how to do any of it. Also, Adam thought I was in the drunk tank downtown and patiently waited for my release there. They told him I wasn't there so he went home, having absolutely no idea what happened to me until I was finally able to get a call through, way late in the morning. Poor both those guys.

Skip Me

Once I take a few days between posts it's really hard to get going again. Do I give a synopsis? Start fresh to save time? Allow myself a shit post just to get back on track?

I had started to tell my arrest story but found I lacked the patience this morning. That will have to wait for another time. Til then, unless you're a close friend, don't even bother with the rest of this post. Skip down to some pictures or biting political satire or such.

Well. Anniversary went nowhere near good. Probably not too surprising. So we called a mulligan Friday. And then a mulligan on Friday on Saturday. And then Sunday, after a crap day here, I left for band practice and didn't come back til Monday morning. Adam's fine with it if I remember to call, but I didn't bother, couldn't bring myself to. Dreading home is not a good feeling at all. Something's got to break here. Hopefully some peace will settle in.

Erwin starts leaving Iraq tomorrow! Still no idea when he's going to get into town, but for the week that they release him from his desert prison, I might be scarce. GOD I can't wait!! A week is not long enough. Guess I only need to wait another...what did he say....5 months or so before I can actually hang out with him with no deadline approaching.

I've got a supremely busy couple of weeks. Today I've still got to fit in cleaning my apartment, homework, a mystery shop and class tonight along with all the SuperMom stuff. Better hop to...better posts to come, I swear...they're all in draft mode right now waiting inspiration...

200 Things

Yeah, it's like my 4th wedding anniversary and all, but. We won't go there. Instead:

Stolen from Wiggle Bottoms. Things I've actually done in bold:

01. Bought everyone in the pub a drink
02. Swam with wild dolphins
03. Climbed a mountain
04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive
05. Been inside the Great Pyramid
06. Held a tarantula.
07. Taken a candlelit bath with someone
08. Said 'I love you' and meant it
09. Hugged a tree
10. Done a striptease albeit a crap one
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea
14. Stayed up all night long, and watch the sun rise
15. Seen the Northern Lights
(click for more)

Yep. Fucking Christmas.

So the glass repair people were supposed to be here between "8-12." At noon I called to find out where the hell they were, and was told I wasn't in their computer system at all, you know, despite them giving me a quote and setting up an appointment with me the day before. So the girl made me an appointment for this afternoon between "1-5." At 5 I called to find out where the fuck they were and was told that she had accidentally made my apointment for tomorrow. So now, after an entire day wasted having to be within 10 minutes with a toddler walking distance from home, after carrying my cellphone with me into every room all day, I found out it was a complete waste of time and now I can't take Jeremy to school in the morning like I promised. And of course they didn't bother to apologize at all.

And then, after chopping up all the veggies, grilling the chicken, getting all the sides ready, Adam can't eat fajitas with us tonight because he's busy playing his video game. And plugging Jeremy into the Gameboy any time I'm not right there available to distract and play with him pretty much every day for more than a week now. And don't even get me started on why it's not a good idea to let a 3 year old watch Power Rangers because, apparently, my argument wouldn't be cogent enough to convince you anyway. How the hell do you raise a child with someone who has completely opposite parenting styles as you? Cuz it really seems like everything I do (teaching Jeremy to be as active, creative, and independent as possible) Adam completely unravels since he sees nothing wrong with 12 hours of TV and video games a day...

I'm having a crap day. And I should probably learn better than to call people to bitch, so I'm doing it here. Scusi.

It Must Be Fucking Christmas

To the idiot punks who smashed my window in and didn't even bother to rob me, FUCK YOU.

And, of course, with my $500 deductable, I'm eating it. So much for Vegas next month.

Any information leading to the arrest of some drunk 17 year olds in Mira Mesa with a rock last night will get nekkid pictures.

That Trick Never Works!

As my 200th post approaches, I've got some great posts in the works. But today, I'm still waking up and a bit hungover. This will not be one of those posts.

Last night "just one drink" turned into three or four turned into this:

I'm such a dork with my camera phone now, taking dozens of shitty looking photos every day now. Anyway.

Went to Scolari's with Shanti and Chris and The Ses were playing, some band I had never ever heard of before. Some of the stuff they played I really digged on and then some stuff sounded like everyone else. If they keep thinking while they write their songs rather than being lazy or obvious or whatever it was, they could be really good. Operatic came on next and it was awful and we left.

Deadbolt rocked the hizzous at the Ken, though, so that made up for being tortured at Scolaris. I'm leaving out all the lurid details of my night, which I'm sure you'll thank me for. 'Twas fun.

Tonight I'm headlining at the California Club on 55th and El Cajon. See flyer below, and I'll see you there!